By: Slam

With it being a New Year and all I decided it might be time to make some resolutions or eurolutions which would be appropriate for this occasion.  Here’s one eurolution for every Euroleague team for 2010, find your team’s.

Happy New Year from Euroleague Adventures

I AJ Milano will let every player have one pair of Armani Jeans if they promise to make the Top 16.

I Asseco Prokom will, after allowing a league leading 666 points against, watch the movie “300” until they understand the concept of defending something.

I Asvel Basket will get Rawle Marshall the ball as much as possible as they are 3-1 since he arrived.

I BC Khimki will make Timofey Mozgov, Robertas Jovtokas, and Paulius Jankunas move in together so they can develop some big man chemistry.

I Caja Laboral will make everyone grow Tiago Splitter’s facial hair because it’s working for him.

I Cibona will make shirts for everyone to wear that say, “We hustle more than you, We play harder than you,We will defend better you, and We’re Going to the Top 16!”

I CSKA Moscow will not let anyone shower, shave, or change any part of their routine til this winning streak is over.

I Efes Pilsen will have the team locked in a room together until they can all decide to play together nicely.

I Entente Orleanaise will start thinking about what might be the best vacation spots will be good for team bonding this offseason.

I EWE Baskets will keep Jason Gardner in a glass container all offseason so he can’t possibly get hurt.

I Fenerbahce Ulker will erase the three point line on their court so the team can actually work the post on a consistent basis.

I Lietovus Rytas will get Martynas Gecevicius as many shots as he needs because they win games when he makes 3’s.

I Lottomatica Roma will have every player watch a loop of their opening 3 game winning streak and have the coach keep saying “Let’s do it again!”

I Maccabi Electra will give D’or Fischer and Stephan Lasme more playing time they we can make everyone else in the Euroleague scared of two of the most fierce shot blockers around.

I Maroussi BC will take the name off the back of everyone’s jersey and replace it with “No Respect.”

I Montepaschi Siena will not let ANY team score more than 75 points against us the rest of the season.

I Olympiacos will start a retirement fund for Nikola Vujcic.

I Panathinaikos will get not play Sarunas Jasikevicius until the Final Four to ensure he is healthy .

I Partizan will not lose a home game from here on out.

I Real Madrid will have a team getaway in Ibiza and take Slam with them.

I Regal Barcelona will not lose EVER.

I Unicaja will give Cesar Augusto Lima productive minutes so he is ready to breakout later this season.

I Union Olimpija will give Matt Walsh a blank check and ask how much it will be to keep him.

I Zalgiris will leave Linas Kleiza annoying voice messages everyday until he agrees to come back home and play for them.