Darko Milicic transcends transcendence. It is time we honor Him, immortalize Him in our navigation menu, otherwise known as “the link thing on top”. To assume a score above 90 is to stare omnipotence in the face, while hovering in the 50s brings the rains of shame crashing down on your head.

Darko knows bleached tips can shield your locks from such a tempest. He shows us the way.

Now I humbly present to you, the Darkometer. The scale upon which all international prospects shall now be weighed, analyzed, and compared to Him.

He was drafted for our sins, that we might live to righteousness. He will come again in glory to judge those molded in His image.

The first poor soul to be gazed upon by his Serbness: Jonas Valanciunas of Lithuania. And away we go: