The Dotted Line Up: Ranking all 75 Euroleague free agents. Sofo is big, but Ibby Jaaber’s bigger.

By: Freaknick/@euro_adventures

This week brings us ten new additions to the big board consisting of eight fresh signings, a Lithuanian no longer on loan and one guy that I simply missed in my last ranking. Oops. Time to make things right, starting with literally the biggest acquisition of the Euroleague offseason.

Sofoklis Schortsanitis, Center, Maccabi Tel Aviv (from Olympiacos)

Honestly, is there a more known commodity in all of European basketball than Big Sofo? Dubbed “Baby Shaq” for his dominance against the USA in the 2006 FIBA World Championships, “Summer Shaq” for his impressive hoopage for the Clippers in summer league play, and spots with both Olympiacos and Maccabi already on his résumé. Can he really be just 25 years old? He could eat other men his age. With the whimsical Pini Gershon ousted from the Maccabi sidelines, look for new Coach David Blatt to employ a much more steady rotation with the newly slimmed down Sofo (no, not a joke; lost about 50 pounds coming into last season) topping out at around 20-25 minutes per game. And after going up against Sofo’s Greek destroyers this September in Turkey, Team Russia’s head coach will have had his fill of Schortsanitis in the opposition’s jersey.

Ibrahim Jaaber, Point Guard, AJ Milano (from Lottomatica Roma)

My. Boy. Remember when I picked him to lead the Euroleague in scoring? Yeah, I’ve been trying to forget also. But after the first four weeks when Ibby averaged 16 per game and Roma was 4-0 I was looking pretty smart. As is always the case though, my wisdom never lasts and he crapped out 16 points over his next five games. So 63 in weeks 1-4, 16 in weeks 5-9. When he tried to wash the bad taste from my mouth with a 23-point game vs. Union Olimpija in week 10 it was too late.

But I’m a devoted follower of each and every one of my senseless infatuations and Ibby’s no exception. The best news in all of this is that he heads to AJ Milano, already piloted by speedster Morris Finley and famous for their fastpaced brand of hoop. No more launching it up over double teams or elbowing your way inside the arc for an awkward jumper. STOP: Jaaber time.

Pops Mensah-Bonsu, Power Forward, Caja Laboral (from CSKA Moscow)

It’s no secret that I’m a fan of athletic bigs, and Pops might be one of the world’s best examples of that. Screw basketball ‘purists’ who think a back-to-the-basket game is a must for any self-respecting big man. These days you’re more likely to find a power forward working on their 3’s than doing a Mikan Drill, so three cheers for Pops and anyone else who’d rather grab an offensive rebound than hit an 18-footer. Let’s make it official: Caja Laboral will lead the Euroleague in scoring next season and will replace Olympiacos as the ‘fun’ team to watch. Are they my championship pick? Let’s not get carried away just yet.

Rasho Nesterovic, Center, Olympiacos (from Toronto Raptors)

He’s 34 now and not what he used to be. A good question might be: what did he used to be? A cumbersome piece of defensive machinery who clogged things up offensively yet always seemed to make teams better. Now that his 12th year of NBA service saw his minutes drop beneath 10 minutes per game he decided it was time to move closer to home sweet Slovenian home. He’s won here before though, as he picked up a Euroleague title with Kinder Bogna in 1997-98. He’ll still be effective but in a frontcourt that already includes Ioannis Bourousis, Nikola Vujcic (possibly not), Matt Nielsen and Andreas Glyniadakis he’s not adding the athleticism that the Reds will sorely miss this year.

Malik Hairston, Small Forward, Montepaschi Siena (from San Antonio Spurs)

When Montepaschi re-signed Rimantas Kaukenas I applauded the pick-up (or the bring-back) but needed something esle to satiate my thirst for a perennially competitive Siena team. Kaukenas was great, but he was still 33. Pietro Aradori is in line for a big time breakout season in my book, but he’s still just 21. If we could just average out the age and find a slashing, strong small forward to D up a position or two then Bo McCalebb and Ksistof Lavrinovic would have a well-constructed group around them just like they deserve. Why hello there, Malik. Nice to see you.

He’s got the physique and the mentality to fit in immediately after a year with Popovich and the Spurs which ended with him averaging 29 per game in the D-League, which is impressive despite the 2,000% stat adjustment exercised due to the absence of defense in the NBA’s little project. He won’t make people forget about Romain Sato, but he’ll be good for a season-long distraction.

Kyle Hines, Power Forward, Brose Baskets Bamberg (from Prima Veroli)

The classic case of an undersized big guy who can rebound the shit out of a basketball yet never gets the looks he deserves. 18.5 points and 8.1 rebounds is no small feat even in the Italian Second Division. Think of a smaller Travis Watson who cares.

Mario Delas, Forward, Cibona (on loan from Zalgiris)

It’ll be nice to see what he can accomplish with big minutes for a smaller club after surviving the ruckus in Kaunas last season with Zalgiris. He’s only 20 years old and if he ditches the Dirk impersonation on offense we’d all be better off. Take it to the hole, Super Mario.

Mindaugas Kuzminskas, Small Forward, Zalgiris (back from Siauliai where he was on loan)

I had the chance to watch Mindaugas play live three different times this past season—twice in the Baltic League Final Four and once in the LKL semifinals—and he left me with a different impression each quarter. They ranged from “he looks like the descendant of a Nordic alien that gave birth to Tayshaun Prince” to “Wow, what a Durant-esque look to his jumper. I’d draft him in a heartbeat, but he still looks like an alien.” The final verdict was a combination of the two, but he’ll be a nice source of depth at a position which now features Dainius Salenga in a starting role. Stealing minutes from the veteran is only step one in his planet’s mission to take over the galaxy.

Dimitris Katsevelis, Guard, Olympiacos (from Thessaloniki)

I can’t tell you too much about Dimitris, but if Olympiacos is putting its faith in the 19-year-old then I trust his potential. They might loan him out for a season, but practicing with Papaloukas, Teodosic and Spanoulis should yield a diverse array of offensive philosophies: pass, shoot, drive. Hope he listens to them all.

Andrea Iannilli, Forward, Lottomatica Roma (from Mazzeo San Severo)

More of a sidenote to the Darius Washington re-signing (remember, The Dotted Line Up focuses on fresh faces), Andrea has some skills of his own. More like, “a” skill of his own: rebounding. Can’t have too much of that.

And while these ten are getting fitted for new jerseys, check out where I ranked them on our newly updated 74-man list. Remember that on The Dotted Line Up, team need, individual abilities, and my own personal grudges will be taken into account somewhat equally. Your opinions, if unretarded, might be also. These rankings reflect expected contributions for the 2009-10 Euroleague season, which is why you’ll find most of our prodigious teenagers near the bottom. File complaints below: